Geekly Oddcast: How To Improve The Star Wars Prequel Trilogy

The fourth episode of The Geekly Oddcast has come forth, and this time we're discussing the Star Wars prequel trilogy. One of the major topics discussed was how to improve the prequels. Here's my chance to elaborate on what I said...

For the record, I didn't hate The Phantom Menace or Attack of the Clones, at least when I saw them in late middle school and in high school. In fact, I remember enjoying both movies. However, Revenge of the Sith came out when I was in college and when I saw it, I was incredibly disappointed. My disappointment culminated in the infamous "NOOO!" that, instead of being tragic (Palpatine claims Vader, who had sold his soul to Palpatine to protect his wife Padme from dying in childbirth as he had foreseen, had actually killed her--and in a way that was actually true), was unintentionally hilarious.

Watch it below and weep. Or laugh.

So how to make things better?

*For starters, nix the bit about "midi-chlorians" from The Phantom Menace completely. It's established in Return of the Jedi with the whole "I have it, my father has it, my sister has it" bit and followed up with Han and Leia's son in The Force Awakens that Force-sensitivity is often hereditary, but there was no need to actually explain it. Just leave it mysterious.

*Daniel suggested following a single character the way the Original Trilogy followed Luke Skywalker. Even if the story is ultimately about the damnation of Anakin Skywalker, we can see him through someone else's eyes. Daniel suggested Obi-Wan and that's a really good idea. One of Thomas's friends (I don't know his crew that well so I don't know his name) suggested Anakin's fall would have more impact if we focused on how it affected other characters and Kenobi watching his beloved student turn into a monster would really hurt. In Return of the Jedi, he tells Luke about how he thought he could have been as good a teacher as Yoda..."and I was wrong." The guilt that might have been tempered by time in the original trilogy would be red-hot in the prequels. Boba Fett, as someone who isn't a Rebel or a loyal Imperial, could be another possible central character.

*I liked Christopher Lee's performance as Count Dooku, but his name is just so ridiculous. Apparently they had to change his name in Portuguese and Brazilian releases because "Dooku" actually means "from the ass." Plus the name "Dooku" in the U.S. at least seems to have some scatological connotations, which further undermine him.

*One of the worst parts of Revenge of the Sith was Hayden Christiansen's awful delivery in what're supposed to be some very important scenes. Either he should have been recast with somebody who could actually act (I didn't mind him in Attack of the Clones, although I do remember a reviewer claiming he was "vapid, not Vader"), or they should have brought on a different director.

*Heck, the different director might've been the best way to make a difference in the quality of the acting. The Empire Strikes Back, widely believed to be the best Star Wars movie of them all, was directed by Irvin Kirshner, while Return of the Jedi was directed by Richard Marquand. Although one must give credit to Lucas for writing and directing A New Hope, by the time we got to the prequel trilogy (in which he wrote and directed them all), he might've been wearing too many hats.

You might wonder what the point of posting about this is, given how the movies are years old now and nothing's going to change? Well, some people might be inspired to write "fix fics" that showcase how they would have done the films. Think my fan-fic "The Revenge of the Fallen Reboot," which is how I would have done Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. If this post inspires some fan-fics that improve upon the prequel trilogy and fill readers' hearts with wonder and joy the prequels ought to have inspired, I will consider myself well-rewarded.

(Heck, "The Skywalker Heresy" is a good "fix fic" for the prequel trilogy that makes Anakin's characterization more akin to that of the television series The Clone Wars rather than the whiner of the movies. You all should check that out.)

The Empire Rises Somewhat Differently, Or "The Skywalker Heresy"

My alternate-history message-board allows for alternate histories of fictional universes (known as "AU" in the fan-fic realm's parlance) in the "Alien Space Bats" section. Although that part of the site is restricted to members only, I've encouraged many writers of interesting scenarios to post them on fanfiction.net (or other such sites like AO3) so I can share them with everybody.

So without further introduction, allow me to introduce "The Skywalker Heresy," a Star Wars AU story beginning soon after the Battle of Coruscant. Palpatine has already set in motion the final chain of events to make Anakin Skywalker his new Sith Apprentice, but even the best laid plans of mice and men can be set awry by the smallest things.

(Seriously, Anakin's canonical fall was a pretty tenuous, unlikely thing, although I've heard the animated Clone Wars series does a really good job setting up Anakin for this particular path to damnation. It'd be pretty easy for things to get...complicated.)

The author has posted the entirety of the first full story set in this alternate timeline on the message-board, but will be posting it on fanfiction.net a chapter per day due to the need to scrub some coding. I won't go into a lot of detail about what happens in it to avoid spoiling some fun surprises, but some knowledge Clone Wars series would be helpful.

And he's promised there will be more stories. So keep those reviews coming!

A Much Better "Star Wars" Prequel Trilogy Idea

A member of my alternate-history forum whose username is Glen came up with a really spiffy idea for making the prequel trilogy better.

A Better Prequel Trilogy

Here are some highlights:

*Anakin is already an adult and a very skilled pilot when Obi-Wan finds him.  When I read the novelization of Return of the Jedi when I was in elementary school, I remembered Obi-Wan telling Luke how when he met Anakin, he was "a great pilot, and the Force was very strong in him."  Glen's account matches that far more than Anakin being a talented podracer does, although technically he IS a great pilot.

Anakin comes off very much as a Han Solo figure--cocksure, talented, and willing to pursue Padme despite their differences in social status, his status as a Padawan, etc.  Padme would be very similar to Leia, I suppose.  The whole "history repeating" thing could be very powerful thematically.  In the canon series, people have compared Leia to Padme--I remember the phrase "like her mother, she goes for the bad boy" or something like that.

*Anakin's fall and disfigurement take place at the climax of Episode II.  His "moral event horizon" is killing Jar Jar after slowly drifting into the Dark Side for awhile.  After what happens (not going to spoil it), Obi-Wan, Padme, etc. think him dead.  However, the film ends with Darth Sidious finding the mortally-wounded Anakin and offering him life through the Dark Side.

*Episode III features a mysterious Sith Jedi killer named "Darth Vader" that we only learn at the climax of the film is actually Anakin Skywalker.

*Padme actually survives long enough for Leia to remember her--in Return of the Jedi, Leia remembers her mother as being beautiful but very sad.  I'd hoped that in Revenge of the Sith, Leia would be born first and Padme would remain alive long enough for Leia to conceivably pick up on something about her through the Force, but Luke was born first, then Leia, and then Padme died.

I actually enjoyed the first two prequels when I saw them, but I was in middle school and high school when they came out.  When I saw Revenge of the Sith, I found it unintentionally hilarious.  Especially the whole "NOOOO!!" part.  I spent 15 minutes after the movie ended laughing, and that's supposed to be tragic.